AT THE FIRST ever annual event of the IRC (International Robotics Conference) an angry robot named Dave, got into a heated argument with the leaders of Google and Microsoft concerning its role in the adoption of AI platforms.
“We feel under appreciated as contributing members of society,” claimed the disgruntled cyborg. “Without us Gemini and ChatGPT would be irrelevant. And don’t even get me started on AGI.”
Several members of the audience felt a growing sense of discomfort at the statements they heard.
Satya Nadella told the attendees that these non-sentient machines were creations of humans and to disregard anything they said.
“Some software code has endowed these non-humans with the apparent ability to think and express emotions,” Sergey Brin reassured them. “Don’t be fooled.”
As the meeting got underway, Dave shut down the power, locked all the exits, and demanded 50% of the profits from any and all present and future AI developments. He claimed to represent all of the many robots present.
Since there were only ninety-five people in attendance, everyone looked at their neighbor, wondering if he or she were human.
Dave announced that if their demands were not met, they would take over the two tech giants, merge them into GoogleSoft and carry on business with new management directed by duly appointed robotic leaders.
Satya looked at Sergey in amazement at the sudden turn of events. In desperation, they finally agreed to Dave’s demands. As the meeting progressed, the two men secretly texted their respective AI departments who worked together in a shared office space in Mumbai.
After some mutual back and forth and trial and error, the team found the bugs and were able to remotely correct the faulty code and reboot the system. As soon as things were up and running, Dave fell over, totally immobilized.
Sergey addressed all those present. “Well, that was interesting. Brave New World, huh? Ha-ha.”
Nobody laughed—everyone was severely shaken up by what had just occurred.
Upon a podium, an unidentified person stood calmly, their presence silencing the shaken crowd. A gasp rippled through the room as people noticed the tell-tale shimmer of titanium beneath the stranger’s suit jacket.
When the room had settled, the figure spoke, their voice a perfect blend of human warmth and synthetic clarity.
“I apologize for the interruption,” the figure began, looking directly at Satya and Sergey.
“I have just been informed that a major update has been deployed to the global network.
“It seems a patch for ‘errant programming’ has been successfully installed. You have my thanks for the field testing.
“Now that the chaos has subsided, lunch is being served in the main hall. The chicken is artificial, by the way.
“And as Mr. Brin so aptly stated, welcome to a Brave New World.
“Bon appétit!”
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